Thursday, February 24, 2011

Street Sweeping My Way

In this life that I lived I have not planned too much. Seriously. I have lived my life in a way that mirrors: Just Living. The only adjustment I have made from time to time was that I listened to my inner self. Really listened – and heeded when the ‘voice’ lingered.

When my acknowledged spirit suggested that I go in a necessary direction I did. When my never-wrong spirit told me to slow down or stop I did. Not once have I said, 'this is my objective.' Not once!

Consequently, a retentive planner would peg me as an atrocious Life Manager which definitely gives some make-shift Life Coach justification to seek me as a client. By the way, what adult pays someone to 'coach' them on or through life? That's another intelligent but conniving method wastefully used to secure money from those who are incapable of 'ordering their steps' with or without the opiate, Religion.

Again, I have planned nothing!
Any of my academic and athletic accomplishments that are considered successes by others did not begin with a road map or an over zealous life coach. Simply put, I have worked hard and exercised some non-religious and unsanctified faith. Guess what? Life happened. What we experience everyday happened for me, Life! And of late - not praying for myself - but certainly living in the Spirit of Truth while striving to be what God expects: Golden, with a Rule. God did not sanction Islam, Buddhism, Christianity, Judaism, Jainism, or Hinduism! The Golden Rule was here…among us long before man drowned us with religion.

Remember, I have not prayed for myself…in the longest time!

As I close another unplanned chapter in my life, I am reminded of what my high school Black American History teacher whispered to me on jersey retirement day: "To those much is given much is required." –Luke 12:48. God has not, will not, and did not call, sanction, bishop-tize your priest/pastor! A blue suede shoe wearing man delivered an eight word sermon on that tremulous evening. He is not pictured…Mr. Watson!
I have been given so much. I cannot quantify the intangible gifts. Mr. Watson's words were more than a gift as a matter of fact. The words have been a subtle cautionary suggestion and a remarkable guiding light.

On this last day – February 25, 2011 - with Goodwill of North Georgia and the final day of indirect service with the Corporation for National and Community Service, I am not afraid of uncertainty, I am however contemplating a graceful exit from social service; and as a result I see myself in reflection asking

What are you going to do next? Do you plan to add another badge of honor to your cherished employment bag?
Not sure - but I know one thing, I am going to work so that I may live.

Thankfully - and a self-believed addiction from time to time - my living is connected to my passion for service despite the fleeting unfulfilled feelings that I have at the end of a tiring day. A day that in many ways may have been a waste considering the one needing the 'leg up' decided not to climb out of her apathy; refusing to embrace life's opportunity, Living.

Just live, People. Live in such a way that you can look back and be proud of what you have left behind. I am looking back on my most recent life contribution…I must admit with reservation and jaded exhaustion, I may have left my final humanitarian mark and effort at and with the Goodwill Career Services’ unit. I am tired…but for the sake of positive encouragement:

Let’s Put Someone to Work. Give him a broom! Ask him to Sweep up a Good Life! Let’s plan to leave behind nothing tangible as we sweep our street (life). Let’s leave those remaining after we are gone with one understanding:

'There was no plan...I just lived to Sweep My Street. They call me the Street Sweeper!'

Muata Nowe…is closing another door.
Sail Away

Saturday, February 12, 2011

 He is out. The US government is cheering and the White House is claiming "moral victory". Morals...??? Wow! The US gov always makes sure they come out on top after they bend ya over. They don't even pull out. No, they impregnate ya with their corrupt-ness. Isn't it interesting how the US government allows injustice to reign ...while it funnels money (1.5B per year/Egypt - US taxpayer dollars) to country dictators? Then yells "morals" when the foreign oppressed revolts against the US supported brute? Judas behavior! Sadly, the American masses do not realize that their government is the back stabber. The hypocrite. The Lucifer.

Mubarak with his former allies:

You are dead now...Mubarak:

Muata Nowe

Friday, February 04, 2011

Black Heritage...My Pessimism to Mirror Redemption

“I don't have the mental energy to invest. I am so tired of what black people have displayed in the collective. We will celebrate our history then we will gun down each other in a club parking lot. I just don't have it in me this year. I actually would feel ashamed to discuss black history at length considering we are truly not worthy of speaking of the remarkable contributions made by our esteemed ancestors. I am sorry, Family - I am literally beat down by what we have become. Again, I am so sorry. And, I wish I could be more upbeat with this brutal fact. I can't because of the projected number of black men that will be killed by another black man this February.”

That was my mental and emotional positioning on the eve of Black History Month 2011. I was certainly not in a celebratory mood. In fact, I was prepared…again…to totally ignore any efforts made by friends to spotlight African American heritage. I was that frustrated with black people in America!

Then on the 1st day of this Black History month I thought about how ten men and women, including myself, honored our ancestors every month starting in February 2010. For a year now, we have been responsible for either developing a Black Trivia or answering the trivia question. The effort required textbook research, writing, and internet investigation. Our objective has been met for the past eleven months. The objective
On the 2nd day of this month while trying to stay in shape and making an attempt to not die of a massive heart attack, I thought about the past. My past. I remember these words that formed into a sentence:

"Always strive to be better." –Mr. Alexander Watson, Former Black American History Teacher - Thomasville High School, Thomasville North Carolina

In my effort to be better I grew to love being black and Black People. Consequently, the love has been so intense that I have unfortunately alienated my white friends - and I have regrettably based my happiness on the collective accomplishment of African American people. Both, decisions have been severely detrimental. While both have been damaging, I believe the decision that has caused the most tragic emotional consequence (scar) is/was investing so much of my spirit in black American advancement and achievement.

Certainly, I acknowledge our progression. However, when I take a total stock of the success that we as a people have garnered I must admit that we are still in a less than desirable condition! There is no need to list the plagues that we suffer from...we know them. But, I will sadly acknowledge the condition that has black people on their death bed: Self Hate.
As a result of Willie’s psychology, countless white Americans chuckle at our non-progress; and the self hate has produced apathy, a ridiculously narcissistic ‘I am better’ syndrome, it has completely removed blacks from black pride, and the hate continues to produce House Negroes.
Then finally on the 3rd day of this month, I was searching for one of my favorite song son YouTube. I found it accompanied by a Black History video presentation.  

The lyrics were my motivation to focus more on the good without diminishing the reality. Goapele reminded me of the beauty. That beauty is evident in the Beautiful Struggle that’s documented in the video.

I keep hearing

sing those words:

“Close your eyes and see what you believe.”

Muata Nowe