I am trying to finish reading Salvation, Black People and Love by Bell Hooks.
It has been extremely difficult for me to finish because of the heartfelt substance that reminds me of Love’s absence within the African American community.
Bell’s words are touching...unexpectedly impacting my spirit. Out of nowhere, while reading on several occasions I have become surprisingly emotional. These moments have been quite revealing - and helpful in addressing what and who I see every single day: Myself.
That mirror reflection is my moment to address the damages caused by my former Self-Hatred. The damages that, in all sense of the word, are bad consequences for bad decisions. The decisions that were rooted in the hatred of myself.
But I am not alone…
I believe it to be completely impossible for any other group of people to fully comprehend how Love was stripped away from the black slaves that made their way to the New World as 'cattle property'. Not only, was the horrible ride in the gut of slave ships physically and mentally demoralizing, the brutality of human dignity stripping perpetrated on the black slaves by the slave masters is now a child rearing tactic incorporated and utilized by black immediate and extended family members. The brutality is a learned behavior that stems from living in a hell...Slavery.
Self-hatred concepts, as Hooks states, are masked. It is living in the form of 'cautious' parenting. The type of parenting that reminds black children of their "proper place". It is the parenting that presents itself in the form of communicating to black children that they cannot speak out against racial injustice...that they must not question white authority...that in order to live in the White world the black child must live a life of false self , live a life of meekish pretense and the conscious denial of genuine feelings. Bell Hooks goes on to share the psychological term used to describe this atrocity as Soul Murder.
How does the black person simply end the self-hatred when the oppression of black and brown people still exist? How does the black person remove self-hatred from their actions when it is hatred that’s killing them? (white cops shooting and killing black men)
Is not the killing of black men by the police a reminder that they (black men) are not worthy? How does the young black girl grow-up -while being raised to love herself - and extinguish the hatred that's alive and dormant in the souls of her black classmates, friends and family members?
The magnitude of the Willie Lynch plan deconstructed the mind, body and spirit of black people - and The Fire Next Time still rages on! Black people in various capacities remain participating zombie-like characters...we are The Walking Dead of the 21st century.
Not only is the destruction inflicted institutionally by the White Power Structure and by the overarching Christian Church Body, it is a commonly practiced generational occurrence within black families.
Bell Hooks mentions in her book the all too often black family strategy to "break the spirit of the wilful, creative black child in order to prepare them for living in the world of racial apartheid."
As a child, I was told that I would "never be nothing" by a member of my mother's church family...he claimed his remark was intended to "motivate" me to "do something with my life". I was also told, "I hope and pray that you don't be nothing like your daddy. If you do you will go to prison." To this very day, May 15, 2015, at this mature age of 44 - my spirit has not healed.
My Spirit was Broken
Imagine the "Breaking of Spirits" multiplied by thousands.
Are you able to understand the immense terror this has caused on the Souls of Black Folk? How does one (black person) truly get completely pass this brand of terrorism of the mind and spirit? How?!
In the collective, it has been and will continue to be virtually impossible for black people to eradicate self-hatred from the DNA of black lives considering the toxicity is an ingrained black family child-rearing mechanism for MOST black families - and a present day weapon used by the Western and European World Order in public education, the workforce, entertainment and in almost every facet of life.
Black Love Deconstruction