Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Life is Out of Your Control

Friday is my 39th birthday. One more year and I will be the big FORTY. Can’t wait for that one. Yeah, right. Seriously, I will celebrate that one with all of myself and definitely with friends…ONLY.

Turning 39 does nothing for me, it does not spark any feelings of excitement, nor generates any feelings of euphoric insight. I am just another year older. Of course I can ask myself the same rhetorical question many of us ask each year, ‘What have I learned?’ To be quite honest with you I have not learned anything different from last year.

The world continues to turn each second with or without me learning a damn thing. Actually, if I am really really honest with myself I have not learned any lessons in some areas. Evidence of that is in my duplicated mistakes.

Some believe the world is getting Barack Obama better and others emphatically believe the world is on an irreversible downward spiral. If you know me you know exactly what I think about this world: No comment. Well, let me share one: Me nah like dis place!

No matter what I think one thing is for sure, we are here to get older and then die. Think about that for a moment. Finish? We live to die. That can be such a waste. However, what we do between birth and death is up to us and provides some level of validation to the divine purpose if we do something with our lives. Some chose to do nothing of humanitarian value and others strive to be what God predestined. Think about that too. Predestined?

If it is already written in God’s history book we are in affect just playing our lives out in an orchestrated role. Somewhat like a set script that’s written for us.

Perhaps, in the five minutes it took me to write this it has been reaffirmed to some that what lies between birth and death may just be out of our control. Imagine that. We have no control or power over what becomes of the gift God granted? Makes me ask, ‘Why did God give us life if He has to control it?’

As a matter of theological fact, the lackadaisical way God is managing our lives makes me want another Manager or another Freewill Contract.

Convoluted by Muata.

19 comments:

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

Have a blessed and very Happy Birthday!!! You’re a baby J

-CW

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

All I can say is WOW.

-EFJ

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

...you make some valid points i.e. Negros do swear Obama is the end all to be all and your questioning for some Christians may make you seem Atheist.

BTW, you should consider teaching religion at a college, Seriously!!

-AC

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Muata responds to AC:

I know several Atheist. They are better people than these sanctified Christians. I will trust a non-believer with my life over a Holy Roller.

Obama is the new Jesus: A man with a lot of expectations - but cannot delivered as a result of the way the system shall always be, CORRUPT. God Bless his soul.

I plan to teach on the college level one day.

-Muata

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

Wow! Are you even happy @ being here? Sounds kinda depressing?
Hope you have a better bday than ya write about--

-JG

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Muata responds to JG:

Most of the time I want to just sail outta here. Half Moon Bay, Antigua would be nice place to begin my sailing.

-Muata

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

JG responds to Muata:

What do you think would make you happy? Ever asked yourself that?

-JG

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Muata responds to JG;

happiness is relative. however, i want the world to be better. i want this god so many believe in to show himself and stop all the senseless death. i want people to live a life via reality. my love for humanity has been tainted by the facts and reality of life. it stinks for MOST. just sit and talk with people. we live lives of psychological struggle. complexities. so much so we kill ourselves in various ways.

i want to write and write and write.

-Muata

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

Happy early birthday! Everyday above ground is a day to celebrate. Each day also gives us a choice to learn & experience something new. God is our awesome creator & he created us to worship Him. As with everything else, we have a choice to worship him or worship the ruler of this world & continue to live in sin and cut off our blessing if having life eternal with our father the creator. You make the call! I wish you many blessings & abundant opportunities to learn something new each & everyday.
Peace to you my brother Muata!

-FS

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Muata responds to FS:

According to the good book (bible) our opportunity to truly "worship" God ended when Adam and Eve sealed our fate. Jesus came along so that "we may have life". He supposedly died for our sins. We continue to sin and live lives unworthy of heaven. So, worshipping God has become convoluted. Mixed-up. We don't know how to really do it. Wait. We go to church. That in itself has become 'something to do'. We claim we do worship - but how? If we really were living a life of worship this universe would not be headed for disaster.

-Muata

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

I feel you!

-RS

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

Too tired to think this deeply today. But it is something to ponder.

-RG

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

Oh dear.

So either I have been in denial for the past 15 years, or my Payne is going through the big Midlife C. I remember when we first met, and our first "discussion" was about how much you hated Antigua, and the place really sucked. And I did, at the time, think, 'this guy is a cynical, angry, b*#&h! :) BUT, throughout the year, the more I got to know you, the more I saw the guy that was deeply spiritual, passionate, kind and generous, playful, and who was committed to his personal/spirtual growth...the more I loved my Payne.

SO, even though right now you can't see that guy, and right now you're in a funk, closed off to love, spirit, whatever....I'm going to hold MY Payne in my heart, and carry the hope for you babe. Because of what I do, in normal circumstances I would recommend therapy, but we both know that black=2 0men don't do that, so I won't! lol! :) But I do hope you find a mentor/spiritual advisor, something! that can help you out right now. The world needs
my Payne back.

Love you my brotha, and Happy Birthday.

-SN

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Muata responds to SN:

i am still in the world. still contributing. even in my funkiness. LOL! btw, i am all for therapy. i have been several times. but, why do i need therapy when i speak my realities? these are my truths. i ain't crazy. just complex.

-Muata

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

Have you ever studied reincarnation (Buddhism, Taoism, Hinduism, etc.)? Their explanation for life is that the goal is to become fully spiritual, operating out of a mind that is totally in sync with the mind of God (or whatever name your give the ultimate). You continue to return to earth to learn whatever lessons you need to get you to the next level. The choice to learn or ignore and continue making the samr mistakes is yours. Once you have advanced to the you and God are one level, you don't need to return to the earth level again.

There is more to it, of course. Is it true? I have no idea, but it makes more sense than dying and going to hell for eternity which according to the church is where all non-believers will end up.
& nbsp; Enjoy your birthday. If you don't, you will just have to keep coming back going through the same things until you learn to enjoy life (so say the reincarnationists). I turned 62 in May and loved it - can't wait until I am 70 and on to 100 plus.

-DW

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Muata responds to DW:

I have studied all three. May need to revisit. Because I am in need of re-learning some lessons. Thanks for your insight. I really appreciate you and thankful that we met.

-Muata

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

i totally feel you. everyone can't understand that point of view and you tend to get labled with a whole lotta shit when you express it--a misanthrope, a pessimist, etc, etc. but i get it---completely. also, not too many people are honest. honesty is not in style and probably will never be.

-A Peaceful Journey

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Reader Response:

Brain, I love you. I do not attend a church. I got tired of the Black church issue. Blacks use the church and religion to exhibit their power and form social club like groups because they may not have power no where else, but Brian, please have faith that things will get better and Take care of yourself!!!!!

-SP

Muata, The Shadow, The Black Rebel said...

Muata responds to SP:

God has always been good in word - but I am one to question His whereabouts. In my opinion, He has been absent e.g. the murder and molestation of children, senseless killings of the elderly, etc. No one EVER explains these tragedies. We toss them up as 'occurrences beyond our control'. However, we give credit to this God when we get a raise or a promotion. So, I guess God is around for this - but not to save a life? Let's face it, God is not controlling this atmosphere. If He was, do you think He would have allowed Africans to be thrown overboard slave ships?

We pray, we do something to make the prayer reality, we pray some more, we plead with God, we try to live right - and then many of us NEVER get ahead.

I speak from a disposition of reality without a church-based faith. See the world for what it is.

-Muata