Tuesday, June 26, 2007

White Baby Momma Found Dead: My Thoughts, Reactions, and Questions

Last week I started writing a commentary on the affects of irresponsible parenting. I began on Thursday and finished it with proper editing Sunday night. My plan was to share it with my reading population and a few editors of parenthood focused magazines this Wednesday, but then Bobby Cutts, Jr. was charged with the murder of one of his baby mommas (report has it that he has 3) and with the killing of his allegedly unborn child. Of course my intentions changed. I could not pass up an opportunity to address this Lacy and Scott Peterson type case.


Unlike a typical commentary, I would like to highlight and share a few of my immediate reactions, thoughts, and questions after I got a whiff of Jessie Davis going missing.

*Nothing new. Another white girl missing.

*When will all this news coverage discontinue concerning white women? I am tired of hearing news stories about these Lindsay’s, Paris’s, Britney’s, and even the Jessie’s.

*After three days of Jessie being missing: “She dead and someone close to her killed her.”

*Some deranged white boy she was dealing with shot and killed her.

*After I discovered Bobby Cuts, Jr. is black: “I pray this brother did not kill her and that unborn baby.”

*Why is this handsome brother making babies with an extremely average looking white chick?

*Shouldn't the police be more aggressive with the investigation? Are they straddling the line because Bobby is a cop?

*Why are some black folk coming to the defense of Mr. Cutts so fast?

*The media is doing it again: Convicting Bobby pre-trial.

*How is Mr. Cutts connected to this overweight black woman: Myisha Lynee Ferrell (it appears he has always liked his women of lighter skin tone and less heavy) who was arrested for providing the police with false information?

*And, the big thought: Just because he attended church, volunteered with the youth ministry program, is reported to be a caring & loving person, intelligent, and “God-fearing” (according to the pastor who officiated Bobby’s wedding) does not mean he is incapable of killing someone.

These are just my thoughts, reactions, and questions. Not sure what you are thinking (would like to know), but this situation has already inundated black talk radio. After listening this morning to one show, I was reminded that most people typically have preconceived thoughts concerning various events and other happenings in the news. What amazed me this morning was the level of allegiance we (black folk) give to black suspects when he/she allegedly commits a crime against a white person (quick to defend), but when a black suspect commits a crime against another black person we RARELY support the black person being accused. We RARELY say or do anything to address the black-on-black crime. We even toss it up with: ‘That Negro did it.’ We usually don’t discuss the matter (nothing to say).



Muata said...

Reader Responds:

Good one Muata,

I myself made a conscience decision (in my teens) to stop watching the news because it’s too depressing. Doesn’t mean that I’m not informed because certain things you can’t get away from whether you watch the news or not; case in point- Radio, TV updates, co-workers etc.

I only (initially) read the headlines in this case when she first went missing as I hate hearing of someone missing, nonetheless someone pregnant. However, I would be remiss if I didn’t admit that when I found out it was a brother that was a suspect It intrigued me enough to read the entire article.

I think you are hitting a home run when you say (Some) black people will go to the defense of a black suspect accused of a crime against a white as opposed to a black person. Here is my take on that………………….


I feel, and have felt so for a long time that we (blacks) definitely have a more magnified response when a black man is accused of a crime toward a white person. It’s my belief that this stems back to when blacks (especially men) were hung, burned, dragged by white’s often times for crimes they didn’t commit. We have lost so many (how many we’ll probably never know) of our race to senseless, unjustified, unadulterated racism that its not easy to just “LET IT GO”. Although we may not have experienced it personally, we’ve heard the stories and/or seen the images. As much as we can wish, pretend, act like it’s not there, Race still plays a big issue in our community (and rightfully so, although sometimes not used in the proper context). I’m not one to have a defeatist point or view or play the victim but 100’s of years of enslavement, abuse, and oppression can’t just be forgotten. It takes a long time. I feel that the reason many blacks reacted the way they did when O.J. was found innocent was not because they believed him to be, but because this was one black man the “Whites” didn’t get. Not saying its right, just saying it is.

It’s a shame that we don’t have the same outcry in our own community with black on black crime. A good friend and I were having a conversation and I asked her what would she do if person spit on her? She replied she would try to kill them. I then asked what she would do if that person was White? She said she would have to see an Angel to prevent her from killing them. My point is: Our reactions can be intensified when a white person is involved because it takes us right back to that place that our ancestors were years ago. Again, not saying its right but JUST IS.

Two other interesting points to note:

1. We (Blacks) don’t have the same reaction if it’s a black and latino, or Asian involved.

2. This is the one scenario where double standards work in favor of the Black man in that our people will come to his defense whereas normally American society is a pitfall for black men.



Muata said...

Muata Responds to DM:


The truth of the matter is that not many of us are even thinking along the lines you have given i.e. "Our reactions can be intensified when a white person is involved because it takes us right back to that place that our ancestors were years ago." I have only met a handful of black people who have mentioned your opinion. But yet, a whole lot of us come to the defense of those black folk who are guilty or might be guilty of a horrible crime. Some even support the person just because he/she is black. I am for being there for our people, but I can't throw myself behind someone who may be guilty Darrelluntil I have enough information to make an informed decision. The majority of callers today on the radio show admitted that they had not read or heard one news report, but yet they proudly said, 'I stand behind this man. He is not guilty. He is a brother.'

And to be completely honest, I never have those feelings of "come to the defense of black brother" because of what my ancestors had to endure (in this regard). I try to look at things from a right or wrong standpoint. Who is willing to take some personal accountability and who avoids it? I know you do to.

For some reason we have begun to take the side of the wrong in spite of the possible wrongful act. This is an improvement for us because back in the day we would been TOTALLY SILENT.

Unfortunately, I believe we have taken this so called support thing too far. Wrong is wrong. Right?


Muata said...

Reader Responds:

AMEN Again, to Muata and Derrick!


Muata said...

Muata and Larikus debates:


Interesting that a woman is dead and a man is accused and most people can only talk about what color they are. When the fact is the color of thier skin or the attractiveness of the woman is irrelevant to the issue that she is dead and a man is accused. What does the race really have to do with it at all? If this were some religous thing or some hate crime then that makes sense that some sort of orientation ethnic or religious be important. At this point all of that is irrelavant. Plus the spouse or significant other is usually a suspect in these cases regardless.

I can say that I agree that I am tired of seeing certain people all
over the news but the news has gone way right and wants to protect Bush and his boys so they do not report the news. Larry King has sold his soul by having Paris Hilton on his show.

It is also more interesting that black people do tend to assume the
innocence of a black man when it comes to a crime against white
people. Seriously it's sad.

I haven't even read a peep about the case or the details because when I heard about it I assumed she was dead. I did not think they would find the person. So I said a prayer and I was done with it.

I was just having a conversation with a friend the other day about how you can never tell what people will do when their back is against the wall (deservedly so or otherwise).

I feel badly for this woman and her family. I cannot feel bad for the man until he is acquiited or rightfully convicted.



I have to admit that I never thought a BLACK man would indicate that race/color of the skin does not matter or it is irrelevant. This is a first one for me considering that race is America's number one 'internal' issue when it comes to people relations.

Race has a lot to do with it. If this was a black woman murdered and her black boyfriend was accused it would not be on every news network. You know that to be true, and everyone reading does. This is the reason why race is relevant.

When the majority of black people get to the point of asking the question you have asked ("What does the race really have to do with it at all?") we will be completely defeated by the white man's system and his efforts to make us believe everything is alright.


Muata said...

Muata and Larikus debates:


Knowing me as well as you do you should know that I would take the
opportunity to point out times where I feel like someone is being
wronged when the reason is race.

This is getting news not just because of race. When someoen comes up missing for days and they are found dead a few weeks later it's always news. It's not because the woman is white. Are you really that full of hate that you think that everytime something that is of pulbic interest that race is the center of it? If so you when did you become this person because you are not the person I call my mentor.. Muata is eating your insides out and your voice of reason along with it.

I never said race is irrelevant. As Cornell West's book points out it matters. As W.E.B Dubois pointed out the problem of the 20th century was the color line and it's still an issue. However, you speak about this topic as if race is the only thing that matters. As if some cop who shouldn't have ever recieved a badge lost his temper again but
this time the woman died. He almost killed the other woman but he never got a chance and she says he is crazy.

My issue with race and racism is that we as black people tend to
obesess with it as it's the only thing that matters. When really there are times when it is the least importan things. The only reason we see it as an issue is that we still don't wear it with pride. A person can go to all the black rally's and say all the right things but until he is completely happy and content with their skin and self the person will always feel that their race is an issue to others. I know for a long time I always assumed that when someone didn't like me it was because I was black. It took a while to realize that I looked at it as a flaw subconsciously and deduced that reasoning. TOTALLY STUPID and if you asked people who knew me they would say I was certainly quick to claim racism.

But the real point is this. THIS STORY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH RACE.
If anything is shows us that it's a messed up world and that we do not choose those to serve us a cops very well. If you have been on probation why should you be able to serve as as cop? But you can't get a job that signs people in at the front desk at the Departmen of Justice.

Makes no sense. I read the story and the guy has a history of violent behavior towards women and it does not look good. But I am sure that many black people fulll of hate think the white man is framing him. Maybe so. I used to think OJ was innocent and used to be proud that he was acquited. But OJ has one thing in common with me. SKin tone. But he was always violent towards women and if I could do it all over again I would nto have recjoiced when he was let off the hook. Even if he didnt' kill her he still beat her up more than once and WHAT THE HELL KIND OF MAN IS THAT FOR BLACK PEOPLE TO REJOIICE FOR?

As far as being defeated by the white man's system. Whomever wants to fight the presumed hatred from every white person with their own
hatred. Go ahead. Hopefully all the people with so much hate in their hearts can cancel each other out. You can only kill em with kindness and that by no means is saying you turn the other cheek.

In this case, the fool happens to be black but this story is about one crazy cop and some fat chick that helped him and is gonna wind up in jail and some woman who had a baby by the wrong guy.



You have taken all this personally.

I will say that being full of hate diminishes reasonable thought. I for one think in the most logical and reasonable way that I can. I attempt to play both sides. Some have even said that they cannot determine where I stand on an issue. No unreasonable person can see both sides. I do.

What I do know for sure is that RACE has become a factor in this case because America has a race problem, and the problem ain't going away just because more people are deciding to cross the color line to date, have sex, and get married.

Also, Larikus, what I write is commentary. I have been doing this long enough to know when the reader has begun to internalize the messages/opinions. I ask you to think of me as just a writer when I express my thoughts. Not as a man who hates or who is full of hate. I am told I am full of REALITY and TRUTH. No arrogance with that statement. I am only repeating what I have been told. I have also been told I am a mad black man. I ain't mad. Just concerned and passionate about this world we have created. No one who hates cares about the universe.

Just in case you forgot:

The black man has two enemies.

1) The one who is afraid of his capability to be dominant in all aspects of life. This is the man who has skillfully hindered the progression of countless black men. This is the white man. He still hates you, Larikus, just because you are black. (Ask yourself, who hates/dislikes you now just because you are considered to them as a darkie? I bet you can name at leaset one white man. You know who I am speaking of.)

2) And, the man who defeats the balck man daily. This man is the black man himself. Isn't it funny how the white man has beat us down so much that we have for years defeated ourselves?

How is really to blame? Is it time for us to forget the beatdown and stop whining?

Like I mentioned, if we stop talking about race all will be forgotten and our forthcoming generations will not know of the struggle and they will foolishly enter this world with thoughts and beliefs of 'EVERYTHING IS OKAY'. It is not, my brotha! If it was okay why are white men still disowning their white daughters if they marry a black man? Why are some black mothers telling their sons, 'Don't bring a cracker girl to my house.'


Muata said...

Muata and Larikus continue to debate:


Maybe I took it personal but personally, I had to state how my heart feels and in heart of hearts I feel that this story which we have gone away from is about a small sample of people that happen to be of two races. And there is no underlying racial tone here.

My issues with it are simple. I think we need more dialogue on racial issues. But dialogue requires a few things that I don't think either side will agree to. You have to approach the dialogue and not talk about the past.You talk about what's the next step.

America's racist class structure has evolved even more into a world
far from Adam's Smith's idea of a free market. He forgot to take into account that the leader of the free markey economy refused for decades after the rest of Europe to embrace a society based on something other than skin color. Now our country faces two problems. The past and the

I know all of the same history that you do when it comes to the
african american plight. However, as people spout off all of those
facts about what the slavemaster, congress and jim crow did to us as a race, they always have something negative to say but no one is
offering ideas really.

So I say as a commentator as a mentor, as a respected man, as a father and as a person of faith and convition, use this influence to certainly create the dialogue but in my personal opinion, I say think "we" (americans) need some solutions. My solutions are simple.

A) Race is not at the forefront of every issue involving people of color.

B) Never forget the past but live in the present.

C) That man that hates me ( my fiance's father) is ready to meet with me 1 on 1 and talk about what to do moving forward. I could be
stubborn and say he is a racist so forget it. But then does that make
me any better than him? If a 60 yr old plish man from Western PA can
do it then certainly the ignorant people in my family and even in my
job can give it a try.

At some point there needs to be something other than random comments on a general topic where people say how the otehr races suck. At some point people have to figure out what to do about it and then do something. Lots can talk it but less of them are walking. The worst part is these are the people that claim to make a difference because they volunteer and go to church.



I have no interest in "solving" the race problem the American white man has put into place. Ya see, once we (black folk) start to solve their problem they have with us and other people of color we forget about the issues that they have somewhat started within our race i.e. high unemployment, self-hatred, income disparity, etc. We should not become so polarized and liberalized by this society shift to the point we are neglecting the issues of not only "minorities", but the poor also.

The solution efforts need to start at home. In our community. And, as a matter of fact we should not be trying to convince white folk of our humanity. They know we are human. They just dislike us for no legitimate reason whatsoever other than we are BLACK. So, meeting with your soon to be father-in-law is a step toward you getting him to accept you as a man. I find that to be pathetic. After all these years we still have to reason with them about our human-ness. That is ridiculous. I am even disgusted that my boy is subjecting himself to this meeting. Why do we always have to take the first step towards reconciliation with the hater/devil/evil-doer/racist? I can't do it, Larikus. They should be coming to us begging us to love them. But, they don't. They expect us to get over it and move on. I can't do it, Larikus. I just can't. As long as I live I will help them remember that their grandfathers and mothers created this situation, and the ownest is on them to rectify the evil. No, not us. Them. We have marched and pleaded for too long. What has been the result? We still a N! A non-human. A thing. An it. An object.

To add to my solution: Please try to get your hands on Shelby Steele's new book, White Guilt. It is a pretty good read. I know I recommend books all the time, but reading has helped me either confirm my solutions or it has helped me forge new ones.

I love ya, Brotha!


Muata said...

Muata and Larikus continue to debate:


Well I could not meet with him then what do we accomplish? It's
amazing to me that you feel so much hatred but you left chocolate city to go to the south. The deep south at that and for some reason you act like it was not expected.


They are alive and retired former CEO'S and supervisors and cops and
some have even made it to the legislature. So of course, we have a long way to go. But it sounds to me and please correct me if I am
wrong. You feel that THEY haev the issue and YOU do not. The mere fact that ALWAYS seem to think that THEY hate YOU because YOU are black means to ME that YOU have some internal belief that being black is a something you should be hated for.

No let's dive deeper into this thing. We are the minority in this
country and when you take into the account that many of us do not
participate in the political process (vote at less than 40%) and we have less than 20% of the population, we will almost never really get what you would considers equality. Couple that with the fact that America is run by corporations and that means even less of us have a true stake in the success of the country in general we have a major problem. YOU talk about dialogue but then shun me because I am willing
to speak to a man that does not really want me to marry his daughter. I assume your solution is not to marry her at all. I am sure that would please many but I am not in the business of pleasing those that do not contribute at all to the well being of my life. SO F THEM.

Furthermore, I actually didn't bring it up. He made the first move and I, acting out of love for my woman obliged. Do I really want to go? Not at all but at the same time this dialogue you talk about cannot just be within our community. It has to be worldwide. When I go to this meeting, I will not ask for acceptance because I don't need it. I simply will listen to what he has to say and tell him that my bond is stronger than anything he can imagine with his daughter and get over it or not. We will never drink cofee and play golf together but I don't do that with my own family so that's fine by me.

No nihilistic approach to the issue will solve anything. I wil read the book but you will find that the words in a book can't change what's in your heart and no matter what book you read if your soul is attached to pain that you cannot deal with then the book might as well say F IT .

And let's be clear about a few things. How many times have you spoken out about black people living beyond their means in order to have material things? You talk about income disparty and high
unemployment. My best friend from home lost his job and do you know
what he did? He started selling drugs and now has a criminal record. He refused to get two or three jobs at random places to make a living. He has a 50 inch tv in his living room and nice rims on his ford explorer. We perpetuate these disparities with our NEED for material things. Its not a black condition, its a human condition. However, because of the percentage of us in poverty many of us cannot afford to live the way we live but these people do it anyway. The fact of the matter is that education is key. But it amazes me that we feel that we
don't have to pay into the system but it should help us.

I never said get over it. But when you have an internal issue like you and many others have you must deal with it because it eats away at you and you lose yourself. I would say that I agree to disagree but at some point pupil has to show teacher that teacher is not always right.



Lord have mercy. I know you have taken this to a personal level, but please ease up a little. Dang. I will love you before the white man will. You better believe that.

It is amazing to me that Malcolm was a hater. The Black Panthers were. Angela Davis was. Sharpton is. Farrakhan is. Dyson is. And, I am just because I speak and write with discontent and authority about what the system and the white man has done to us. Come on now. This is where they would like us to be: Arguing. When in fact they are the problem, Larikus.

You know for sure that I don't let no-count black folk off the hook. Never will.

I read for continued education purposes. I never pick up a book expecting it to change me. I like insights, opinions, and ideas. Education.

Internal issue?? Now, you are trippin. The only issue I have is that I expected too much from America. This place has disappointed a lot of folk. But, I have found a way to make it in spite of their lies. I even was a porch monkey for them for about 5 years running around with their name across my chest as I won national championships, and while they allowed me to go without soap, gas money, etc. I worked for that racist school and got nothing in return. Oh! An education. Something anyone can get for free in a prison. But, I ain't mad. Just disappointed.

For the last time, I am not full of hate. Now, what if I were? If you really think about it. We should hate how they feel about us and how they hung our forefathers for nothing. And, we should have hated them back in the day. No, we decided to use love as the answer. Didn't work. It was not until they realized that we could be animals/beast like them that they started to understand. Remember, Nat Turner. He should have killed them and their offspring's. It was the logical to do then. Guess what? As a result of him doing what they did to his family they started to back off.

What we have done is stop holding them accountable. Nope, not me. I do it in the most delicate way too. I am not walking around mad at them. I just don't like too many of them. Why should I? Because it is 2007?

Love me and dislike the DEVIL. The devil is that man who strategically denies you a promotion. He is that man who overlooks your child in school. The devil is all around us even in Washington, DC. Also, Atlanta is a make believe place for black people to feel like everything is okay. It is not. Just drive 20 minutes east, west, north, and south of Atlanta. Look down town. It is high dollar developers who are buying every piece of cement. I knew my reality before I left DC.

So, if I am a hater because of calling them what they have proven to be for YEARS - I will be full of hate. This hate you claim I have produced a successful Black man. I want some more hate so I can be even more successful. All I need now is for some whitey to call me a SPOOK. Boy, it will be on with more HATE!


Muata said...

Larikus' final statement in his debate with Muata:


I hear ya.

Its always personal. If you aren't attached to your opinion then why
even speak? I acutally like Malcolm but find Dyson and Sharpton to be a bit blah.

Be thankful you have a friend that is not always on your bandwagon. I
will never just agree with you because you wrote somethign that sounds good when in fact I am not buying it. This is the dialogue you need.

But you can say that you aren't angry or mad but when you call people out of their names logically people conclude you are angry. There is a fine line between honest and rhetoric. At times you cross it. I will aways point it out to you cause I expect no less from you. If you can wear a t-shirt that says Jesus failed us. Then you certainly can concede the fact that when you call a white person the devil you aren't doin it out of anythign but anger becasue the last time I checked we only call people outside of their names as insults and that is an obvious sign of discontent.


Muata said...

Question....Why is Barack the only presidential candidate that had to get secrete service protection?
All the talking, forgiving and education will never change the facts of today. I do see a change coming in the future but it want be in our life time....we will have to impregnate at least 50% of their women to change that hateful blood line. :)

In the words of Don King from a while back...In their eyes if you
educated you just an educated nigger...if you rich you a rich nigger...if you sleep with them you a nigger they sleep with....but you still a nigger! Im Black and Im Proud!!!!!!


Muata said...

Larikus responds to EJ:

Let's be clear about something. Hilary has secret service as well as some other candidates. You are quoting Don King. Really? DON KING? Samuel Jackson said the same thing in school days. But DON KING? DON

Barack has secret service. SO what? Making a big deal out of it just makes you upset. It is what it is. DO you think that Boris Yeltsin didn't have protection? DO you think that Chavez did not have protection when he ran for president? Do you expect that in a world 60 years removed from the civil rights movement that it would be different. It will be ages before a minority can run for president without some redneck in the south or middle America making a death threat. Honestly, I actually agree with you in some ways that it's messed
up. But quoting DON KING is like saying that SHAQ is a philosopher. This guys is says these things but he is a boxing promoter (one of the most exploitative sport when it comes to minorities) and he is the

Let's not just get all uptight about every detail of everything. Seriously, when we can really make everything see like it’s totally racist. In the movie Boomerang Martin talked about pool being a racist game, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

At some point we have to stand up to people on both sides, Black and white and tell all those with hatred to get with it or get over it. You move on to the future by forgiving the past. And when you can't then you handicap yourself because as long as you hold a grudge you give that person or group power.

I actually hope we have Hilary president, Edward Vice and Barack secretary of state. If we have to throw someone to the wolves that will be the next four years then Hilary is the person and then Barack after having a Kissinger like four years in office can bring the country back to prominence. It's not the right time to be president and I'd rather sacrifice Hilary.


Muata said...

Muata responds to Larikus's comment to EJ:

It is very tactical for you to continue to insinuate that some of us who voice dislike for white people and their actions as "full of hate". Actually, it was the white man's way of discrediting Marcus Garvey. It is tactical because it puts a negative focus on the person who has the issue with the system. Steve Biko and Nelson Mandela were accused of being "full of hate" also, but without their opposition nothing would have been accomplished in South Africa. Martin Luther King, Jr.'s approach was good and necessary for the time. However, we need powerful and stinging voices today from the black ranks.

It is so disappointing to me that you and other black people think we should continue to ask for what is due and owed to us. The day of begging and holding in the stress/frustration which has been directly and indirectly inflicted upon us are over. Sitting down at the table did not work.

And, finally it was Jesus who was killed because he turned over the alter table in the temple. That is why the Romans crucified him. Jesus was mad. He was tired of pleading with the power structure. Yes, all of this is story. But, my point: without Jesus displaying behavior that appeared to cast a light of hate in his heart no LESSON would have been presented to the world at that time. So, stop calling it hate. It is, I AM TIRED OF THIS CRAP! And, many are doing something about it within our community. It is a tough fight, but relinquishing my feelings of discontent with the white power structure is not an option for me, and it should not be for all black people.

Also, as soon as we stop getting "uptight" it is over for us. And, I thought I sounded right-winged. What is happening to you up there? Drive up towards Frederick, MD so some redneck call you a NIGGER! Then you will be back to reality. Peace, NIGGA!!


Muata said...

Reader Responds:

I haven't read all of each of the comments because I haven't had the time to, but I understand each of your points.


This is a fact that will never go away.

Yes, as black folk (most of us) when we see or here of a crime, one of our first thoughts is "I hope that it was not a black person" - for whatever the reasons. I would hope that it's not a black person, but if it is, I and many of us will not come to their defense just because they are black. I'm disappointed at the fact that the suspect is black, because I hate to give white people another opportunity to say more negative things about black folk and I want to see black people get it right and do the right thing.

No matter how good and successful we are as a black person, we always have the fact that we are black, and the fact the some black people do bad things "hanging over our head". The fact that we are good, makes us different and "not like the rest of the black people."

As a black person, the color of our skin is one of the top 3 descriptions of each us. For many people, it's the number one description of us and they cannot get past that one description.

Deceive yourself if you want to - think that Race doesn't matter. It Matters.

It's unfortunate, but a fact.